It's Hard To Say...

11 years ago.  I can remember it like it was yesterday....I had changed my mind.

Some of the singles from my church were going salsa dancing.  I had invited my friend, was dressed and ready to go, then I simply changed my mind.  I no longer wanted to go, but my mom (who was my roommate at the time) convinced me to go on and have fun.

And, it was at that salsa gathering (which I almost didn't go to) that I met my future husband, my then love of my life, my future baby daddy.

That was 11 years ago.  We would have been married 10 years today.

Wow!

I've often thought about how my life may have been different had I not gone salsa dancing.  I was on the upward trajectory to living out my plan of being a worldwide educator and speaker extraordinaire. I had just completed my master's, was soon to begin my doctorate, was living in a cute little spot, and had just found out I had gotten a job as an assistant principal. Life was good.

But, it's hard to say my life would have been so much better had I changed my mind...

It's interesting how being married to him was one of the worst seasons of my life...but, the marriage also changed my destiny because even through the pain, struggle, and tears, I received my most treasured blessings--my sons.

It's just so hard to say the years in the marriage were wasted...

It's so fascinating to me that even pain has been factored into the plan God has for our lives when He created us and brought us into a fallen world. He made provisions for it.

Romans 5: 3 states, "Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings because we know that suffering produces perseverance, perseverance character, and character, hope. And, hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.

Hope is a byproduct of suffering. Isn't that great!

Think about that for a moment...Without childbirth, there'd be no child. Without hurt, there'd be no hope. Without the cross, there'd be no salvation.

Pain is inevitable. But, because God's word tells us suffering can also birth growth, we can rejoice through it because it's only temporary!

So, I stand corrected.  Pondering thoughts of "What if?" really is a waste of time. Life is so purposeful that even pain can't stop potential.

Trust me. I know.

From back to back pregnancies, being undervalued and unloved, losing my career, losing my home, divorcing , being depressed and anger......TO having happy healthy children, enjoying "singledom", experiencing a new career, moving into a new home, embracing forgiveness, and experiencing peace---I can truly say painful perseverance precedes potential and possibilities!

Now that's something that's easy to say. ;)

For my friends...:)

Growth...

That moment your 5 YO keeps asking you to get him a snack and you assure him he can get it (because you're in the middle of a project and don't feel like getting up). 

He asks. You ignore. He asks. You ignore.

He says, "Fine. I'll get it myself."

He does. 

He's shocked. 

You smile.

He hugs you...shocked.

Yeah. That moment...

Eternal Footsteps

I took this pic this morning when I looked out to see if the snow was still there. This IS Texas, so of course most of the snow had melted. But, what lasted were my sons' snowy footprints.

I'm having to trust God on some decisions he's calling me to make by faith, and He immediately witnessed to my spirit when I saw these footprints that all material things pass away, but what we do for Him lasts. We leave an eternal footprint on the journey of God's will to bear lasting fruit. (See John 15:16)

So I'm trusting him. Will you? He is with you with every step.

Something to remember...

Something to remember while in ministry...

The Green Tag Quest

I love The Hobbit movies. I love stories and movies of adventure, battles of good vs. evil, making noble choices, and quests.

A good adventure never gets old!

So, when I had this horrid revelation--that I don't think I've ever read one word from Zephaniah or even Obadiah--my mind determined my newfound journey of studying those books of the Bible to be similar to a Hobbit's tale.

 I mean are not those books also words inspired by the true and living God?

Shame on me!

Now, my self-appointed mission for the next two weeks will be getting to know the authors of those overlooked books of the Bible, or as I have named it, "The Green Tag Quest."

I'm excited about what I will glean, not only about Christ, but about myself. I'll tweet nuggets along the way. 

Wanna join me? First stop...Ezekiel.

Word Wisdom

I was reading Romans and just started thinking about Paul and his life. I began to wonder why God used a man who persecuted Christians to speak to Christians through his writings with letters that make up almost half of the New Testament.

And I had a realization...

Blessing in the doing...

Do what needs to be done...even when you don't fell like it.  You have no idea of the blessings that await you if you MOVE!

Overcome feelings. Overcome emotions.  Overcome negative voices. Overcome them all.

 Why? Because all of those are obstacles to achievement and blessings.

And, obstacles MAY be overcome if you decide to, if you make a conscience decision to try to move past them.

Case in point. I am over doing laundry right now.  I just do not feel like finishing those last two loads. Because, if I wash them, then I have to take the clothes in the washer out.  And, if I take the clothes in the washer out, I have to put them in the dryer. And, If I put them in the dryer, I have to take the clothes already in the dryer out...and fold them.  And, if I fold them, I have to put them away.

Whew! I'm even more tired just typing all that.

But, it needs to be done.  So, grudgingly, I just put the next to the last load of clothes in the washer. I took the clothes in the dryer out, put the clothes already in the washer into the dryer, and then began to fold the clothes I had just taken out of the dryer.

And, guess what??!!

A $20 bill fell out of a sock. Yep, you read correctly.  A SOCK!

What?!!

Yep, do what needs to be done even if you don't feel like it.  The blessings are discovered in the doing. :)

Anything like that happen to you this week?  Were you blessed in the doing? I'd love to hear about it.

Letter Writing...A Lost Art Revisited

I stumbled upon a letter my older sister had written to me when she was a junior in college and I was still in high school.  I thought about how sweet it was for her to take time out of whatever she was doing as a college student and sit and write to her baby sister, who she obviously was thinking of.

I loved the cream and carmel brown coloring of the aged envelope.  I loved seeing her calligraphy handwriting which we so often teased her about. I even loved seeing the dated stamp on the envelope, which had history of its own.

And then I realized how this age of computers has taken away some of the little personable delights letter writing gave.  You know...things like running to the mailbox to see if a letter had come.  The delight I remember feeling when I opened a Christmas or birthday card that was addressed to JUST ME as a little girl, and how proud I was to be opening my own letter (as I was one of MANY girls in my family).  Even smelling the faint scent of the person who sent the card or letter, which somehow seemed to linger between the consonants, vowels, and syllables.

So, I've decided to throw nostalgia to the wind, break the rules of PC and begin letter writing again. Yeah, I'm a rebel.

But, this time I'm going to add a twist.  I'm going to write to the future.

Yep, you read correctly--THE FUTURE.

I touch eternity...I am a mom.

I love dinnertime with my sons.  It's like dinner with the headlines.  I get all the day's major information announced emphatically and with a sense of urgency (remember I have a 4 and an 8 YO).

But, tonight was different.  Tonight my boys were surprisingly silent.

I don't know if it was the amazing "breakfast dinner" of blueberry pancakes I whipped up, the fact that my youngest son was getting over a being ill, or that they just FINALLY ran out of stuff to say...hahahaha yeah, right! Either way, it gave me a moment to reflect...and as I sat there staring at them, my babies morphed into adults.

This happened to me before.  About two years ago, I was cleaning out the tub about to begin our nighttime bath ritual, and had just finish yelling at my oldest son to hurry and brush his teeth for the hundredth time. Then it hit me.  I just yelled at my great-grand kids' grandfather.

What??!!!

Yep, they said that!

My oldest son, Jacob, loves magic tricks.  I even got him a cute little magic box for Christmas and a book on card tricks.  This keeps him and his little brother entertained for hours.

Well, I've become a part of the magic because my boys truly think I can pull things out of their ears!  Haha I hide things they're looking for in my hand, and if I find it first, I cup it in my hand, reach behind their ear and tell them it was behind their ear all along.

Well that's been a wonderful fun game until today.

Releasing The Training Wheels...

While we were going through the motions of our bedtime ritual, I was helping my 4 YO brush his teeth, and my 7 YO (who had just finished brushing his teeth) was wiping his hands and mouth with his wash rag. He then just stopped and stared at me.  I noticed out of the corner of my eye his movement had ceased, but I was too caught up in making sure the toothpaste stayed on my youngest son's toothbrush while also holding steady his little step stool.

When I looked over at him and actually paid attention to what he was doing I caught his gaze.  He smiled at me, hugged me tightly, and said, "I don't want to grow up mommy."  I knew this was a "mommy love" moment by his gaze and embrace, so I said, "What made you say that?  What were you thinking about?" He said, I just want to stay little forever because I don't want to grow up and you grow old and die. 

I laughed and said, "Yes, you do!

Sometimes I wonder...

I know it's not biblical.  I know it's not true.

But, sometimes I wonder...

I wonder if God and the angels sit around with popcorn and get entertained by us much as we would a movie or even the Superbowl many will be watching today.

And, do they laugh at us?

Like when you're getting out of the shower and as you're drying off your feet, your towel gets wrapped around your foot, you lose your balance, and fall (with one foot up) head first into the bathroom door because it's either do that or fall.

You know. At stuff like that...

Yep! They said that...at church!

I have decided that I want my boys to experience children's church AND worshiping with me.  So, I flip-flop Sundays.  Every other Sunday they worship in the sanctuary with me.  This past Sunday was our Sunday to worship together.  Even worship is never a dull moment with my boys...

Jacob (whispering in my ear): Mommy, that man in front of us has earrings on.

Hudson (who has not yet mastered the art of whispering) whips his head around to see the man directly in front of us...then points...then yells loudly:  MOMMY!  LOOK! THAT'S WHO JACOB IS TALKING ABOUT! THAT MAN HAS EARRINGS ON!

Me: Hud, remember on the shuttle bus over here when you said, "That man is too tall because his head hits the top of the bus," and I told you to remember you should whisper what you notice to me in case it hurts someone's feelings? (Hud nods) Well, you're not whispering.

Hud (still loudly while our pastor has now begun to pray): But, Mommy! Why does he have on earrings like a girl! Why do men wear girl clothes?"

(At this point, I'm expecting the entire church to answer his question because he's the only who could be heard as we have begun to pray.)

Before I could tell him, wait a moment because we're praying, Hud shouts an observation he obviously missed the entire hour we've been sitting there about the woman with the bright red tuft of hair next to the man with the earrings...

Hud:  AND LOOK AT HER, MOMMY. WHY DOES SHE HAVE RED IN HER HAIR?  WHY DID SHE DO THAT?

sigh....

HAPPY MONDAY!